June 26th, 2008
08:57
Men
Gary and Lorne were standing at the urinals in a public lavatory, when Gary
glanced over and noticed that Lorne’s penis was twisted like a corkscrew.
“Wow,” Gary said.
“I’ve never seen one like that before.”
“Like what?” Lorne said.
“All twisted like a corkscrew,” Gary said.
“Well, what’s yours like?” Lorne said.
“Straight, like normal,” Gary said.
“I thought mine was normal until I saw yours,” Lorne said.
Gary finished what he was doing and started to give his old boy a shakedown
prior to putting it back in his pants.
“What did you do that for?”
asked Lorne.
“Shaking off the excess drops,” replied Gary.
“Like normal.”
“Cripes,” Lorne said.
“And all these years I’ve been wringing it.”
June 20th, 2008
08:35
Men
Why do men take showers instead of baths?
Pissing in the bath is disgusting.
June 20th, 2008
06:26
Men, Sex
Parking in the driveway after their first date, Roger leaned over and gave Linda a passionate kiss.
When she responded warmly, he unzipped his fly and pulled her hand to his penis. Furious, Linda opened the door and jumped out of the car.
“I’ve got just two words for you,” she screamed.”Disgusting pig!”
And I’ve got just two words for you,” Roger screamed back. “Let go!”
June 19th, 2008
06:27
Men
What’s the difference between a woman’s zipper and a mans zipper?
When a woman unzips her pants her brains don’t fall out!!
A wealthy playboy met a beautiful young girl named Peggy
in a exclusive lounge. He took her to his lavish apartment
when he soon discovered she was not a tramp, but was
well groomed and apparently very intelligent.
Hoping to impress her, he began showing her his collection
of expensive paintings, first editions by famous authors
and offered her a glass of wine.
He asked Peggy whether she preferred Port or Sherry
and she said, “Oh Sherry by all means. To me, it’s the nectar
of the gods. Just looking at it in a crystal clear decanter
fills me with a glorious sense of anticipation. When
the stopper is removed and the gorgeous liquid is poured
into my glass, I inhale the enchanting aroma and I’m
lifted on the wings of ecstasy. It seems as though I’m
about to drink a magic potion and my whole being begins
to glow. The sound of a thousand violins being softly
played fills my ears and I’m transported into another
world. Port on the other hand, makes me fart.”
June 12th, 2008
08:43
Men
Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this, she can’t stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to write a sexual harassment grievance against him.
The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks ‘What’s sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?’
The woman replies, ‘It’s Keith, the dwarf’
