Bar Challenge

A guy walks into a bar and notices a very large jar on the counter and sees it’s filled to the brim with $10 bills… The man guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it! He approaches the bartender and asks, “What’s up with the jar?”

“Well… you pay ten dollars… and IF you pass three tests you get all the money!!!”

The man certainly isn’t going to pass this up! “What are the three tests?”

“Pay FIRST…” says the bartender… “Those are the rules.” So the man
gives him the $10 and the bartender drops it into the jar… “OK,” the bartender says, “here’s what you need to do…

“FIRST: You have to drink that ENTIRE GALLON of pepper tequila… the
WHOLE thing, all at ONCE… and you CAN’T make a face while doing it…

SECOND: There’s a pit bull chained-up out back with a sore tooth… You
have to REMOVE the tooth with your BARE HANDS…

THIRD: There’s a 90 year-old woman upstairs who has NEVER reached orgasm
during intercourse… You’ve gotta MAKE THINGS RIGHT for her.”

The man is stunned… “I KNOW I paid my 10 bucks…but I’m not an IDIOT! I
WON’T DO IT!!! You have to be NUTS to drink a gallon of pepper tequila,
and then do those OTHER THINGS!!!”

“Your call,” says the bartender, “but your MONEY stays where it is…”

The man has a few drinks…then a few more… Finally…he asks,
“WHERRRRE’S ZAAAT TEQUIIIILA?!”

He grabs the gallon with both hands and downs it with a big slurp…Tears
are streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn’t make a face…

Next…he staggers out back where the pit bull is chained-up…The people
inside the bar hear a HUGE, NOISY SCUFFLE going on outside…

They hear the pit bull barking…the guy screaming… the pit bull
yelping…and then SILENCE .

Just when they think the man SURELY must be dead, he staggers back into he
bar …with his shirt ripped… and large, bloody scratches all over his
body…

“NOW……..”he says……”WHERES THE OLD WOMAN WITH THE SORE TOOTH???!”

Money

A Man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself.
Approaching the friend, he comments, “You look terrible. What’s the problem?”

“My mother died in June,” he said, “and left me $10,000.”

“Man, that’s tough,” he replied.

“Then in July,” the friend continued, “my father died, leaving me $50,000.”

“Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you’re depressed.”

“And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000.”

“Three close family members lost in three months? That’s horrible!”

“Then this month…” continued the friend, “Nothing. Not a single dime!”

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