bingbongboo fun

Constipated People Don’t Give A Crap.

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
2.) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.
4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa.
5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.
6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:

Fairwell Honeychild.
7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become:
Poup on Pants.
8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will becom e: Knott NOW!

And finally…

9. Vict oria ’s Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name:
Titty Titty Bang Bang!

Q.  What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
A.  Sum Ting Wong

“POLITICIANS & DIAPERS BOTH NEED TO BE CHANGED OFTEN, AND FOR THE SAME REASON.”

1 large roast of beef
1 small roast of beef

Take the two roasts and put them in the oven.
When the small one burns, the big one is done.

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.

After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.

She repeats this gesture about five more times.

When she is about to hand him another batch again… he asks the little old lady, ‘Why don’t you eat the peanuts yourself?

‘We can’t chew them because we’ve no teeth’, she replied.

The puzzled driver asks, ‘Why do you buy them then?’

The old lady replied, ‘We just love the chocolate around them.’